pick one!

as I sat beside the most gorgeous sleeping creature I’ve ever seen in my life, my husband, I looked at him with great awe but with mixed emotions. I asked myself, “what have I been doing lately? why have I not had enough time to attend to all his needs? he always had to worry what to eat for dinner because no one cooks for him, but didn’t i vow to be his helping hand at all times? why does it seem that i barely have time to take care of him? am i too obsessed with my own career now that i'm slowly taking him for granted?”

the stone of realization just hit me right on the head.  

now i’m thinking, do i really want to work or i’m just too afraid to lose my means of having my own money? because come to think of it, if i would stop working now and just choose to become a plain housewife, then i would no longer have the means to buy myself those things that i have always wanted without having the need to explain. i mean, i’ve been depriving myself of that much desired luxury ever since I started working and now that i can already give myself the freedom to splurge on things that I have always sought after in the past, i need to give it up to become a better wife? i know he will give me money if i ask him but there will always be “that” need to explain, those awkward thoughts, and really, it’s just gonna be so weird and unusual and uneasy for me. don't get me wrong, he's generous and i know how much he loves me. it's just that, i'm not used to being so weak financially. i've been working for five years already, so it wouldn't be that easy for me to rest and be without my own income to survive. sigh (looking at him again). but as I’m typing this, I know that giving up my own selfish demands and guilty pleasures will all be worth it if it means seeing this handsome and seriously HOT guy right here happy and well satisfied every day.

hmmm…  the year is nearly over, so I guess I’ll just have to wait for the coming year and then decide which way to go. i love my job or at least I thought I do, but I’m 101% sure that I love my husband. so I’ll see next year how to best end this eenie-meenie-miney-mo thingy in my head.

goodnight y’all!

WHAT IF THERE WERE NO MIRRORS?

I really wonder how we, girls are gonna fix ourselves if there were no mirrors at all. What made me ask? Well… this morning, my hubby was so amazed while watching me put on my makeup, which by the way is already my tradition as I do it every day before going to work. And that thought about mirrors just came to me. And oh, why didn’t I include boys? Probably because they just don’t seem to care so much how they look like. I mean, sometimes. I mean, only those I that know of. Haha (I really had to insert a lot of disclaimer there).

So yeah, did it ever occur to you how we could have succeeded a day without even seeing our reflection on a mirror, whether it’s a full-sized, half-sized or even just a pocket-sized mirror? And that nothing else on this planet could ever make a reflection of us? I mean, even water would not mirror us. Wouldn’t it leave us with no other choice but to ask other people about our appearance? As in other people would serve as mirrors!

Wouldn’t that be so frustrating and annoying and aggravating and everything else?!!

I mean, if we don’t get to see or judge how we look like, and only those who can see us will get to say that we look okay or worse can even fake it, then I think we’re in serious trouble. Why? Well, they could pretentiously say we already look nice when it’s the opposite or say we look hideous when we look just fine or even seductively gorgeous. If only other people will get to see our appearance then it’s like giving them 100% right to comment if the dress we picked for the day matches the belt we chose and if the shoes that we decided to wear complements the whole attire. Ya get what I mean?! They will have that bragging rights to tell us how we should dress up, tie our hair or how to put on our makeup. On second thought, I don’t think we, girls, could ever wear makeup at all if that would be the case, right?

Whoa! If that will ever happen, I’m pretty much sure it’ll be one hell of a mess! Because accept it or not, we tend to lie every day – I’m just referring to “white lies”. So, if it’s not in your nature to be frank and you’ve been asked by your friend to tell her exactly how that pretty red dress, which she adores so much (but doesn’t really fit her nicely) fits her, would you really be honest about it or would you try some positive scripting, which by the way might (as it happens most of the times) lead her to believing the opposite of what you’re really trying to tell her? And by not telling her that it doesn't fit her well, it's already lying! But by telling her, you might end up hurting her! Oh yeah, I’m again trying to complicate things here, haha. Sorry.

Can I just say that I’m thankful that we have mirrors? That it’s so nice to be able to see our reflection before we even go out of the house and face the world? That I’m glad I don’t have to really answer someone else's question on how they look like, instead I can just lend them my mirror? Easy and simple and will save me from lots of trouble… Hahaha!

So that's all I have to say for now. See yah again soon.

p.s. sorry for my nonsense post. just really trying to unload my mind of all the junks it has for the past few days.

p.p.s. my iphone 3Gs was stolen last Saturday, 5^th Nov at QUANTUM in SM Batangas. made very sad. (...that’s why iphone 4S was given birth =D).

What have I been doin' lately?

just this past couple of days, i've been obsessed with room tour videos on youtube. makes me want to organize our room right away. i'm also getting lots of ideas about different bedroom interior designs. very nice! quite helpful for my job as a designer.

i'm on my way to work now and yah im kind of late already. blame it to my lazy body and our bed that kept pulling me back everytime i wanna get up, LOL.

i have some thoughts about quite a few topics to share here but not now as i prefer to type it on my laptop instead of here (my iphone). 

so yeah, that'll be it for now. see yah later.

STML

has anyone of you experienced this sudden-attack-of-amnesia thingy? weird, right?

lately, i've been having a few stml (short-term-memory-loss) cases but it only happens when i sleep. i mean, last time, i fell asleep and when i woke up, i suddenly don't know why it's so dark in our room, why i was alone and i had no idea where my husband has gone to. i quickly got my phone and called him up. when he answered, he explained where he was and reminded me that i knew it and true enough i remembered everyhthing.

today, the same thing happened. i fell asleep even before my hubby left for work, and when i woke up, it's that same feeling again. i don't know why i was sleeping alone and yada yada yada. i called him up again.

i don't know why i'm starting to be like this. is it because i have this big issue in remembering things, a lot of things, even things in the past? is it because i should learn how to forget? if this is the way to teach me, whoa, it's getting really scary. i just hope there's another way.

'til next time...

Late Honeymoon?

with no real intentions of writing a review about the place where we’ve just been last week, I’m back here to tell you the details of our romantic and fun 3D2N stay at Nirwana Resort Hotel in Bintan Indonesia.

let’s just look back a little. my hubby and I both filed a leave from 15-16 Sep (Thursday-Friday) with the expectation that we’ll have thurs-sun to ourselves exclusively. unfortunately, he was given such a cruel time in his office and so the supposedly 3D2N vacation in Phuket Thailand that we looked forward to for so long just vanished in an instant, just like that. but since, we didn’t want to waste our leave from work, my hubby, (the planner-freak that he is), still looked for ways how we can unwind and be out of reach for at least a day and half (even if the promo says 2D1N). I haven’t told you yet but last time when we went to Bintan, we told ourselves that we will come back to explore the place more and so yeah we did! hubby booked for a 2D1N stay in a… wait for it… HOTEL SUITE! yeah. it’s a first. isn’t that sweet?

and so… with no clear itinerary on hand, there we were at Tana Merah Ferry Terminal on a Thursday afternoon (almost 1PM) waiting for our ferry to depart. after almost an hour of travel via ferry (they call it “high-speed catamarans”), we were then brought to the hotel by Nirwana Bus (as it has the name Nirwana Gardens spray painted on its side).

as usual, hubby took care of the check in details at the reception area. all I always had to do was wait on the side until things are settled (yeah I was completely useless). when everything’s done, we went directly to our suite, and voila!

after we have taken pictures of the room and everything in it, and fixed our things, we did what we were very well expected to do as a couple who just got married not so long ago (2 months and 29days to be exact). it is ROMANCE at its BEST!

after the romantic activity we just did, we decided to roam around. we went to the beach and swam at the infinity pool until six in the evening. it was by so far the most fun and relaxing things I’ve ever done since 2011 started.

when we went back to our suite, my hubby then saw that we have a voucher for 1 free game of bowling and he loves bowling and I love so much seeing him does the things he likes. we asked the reception where the place to play bowling is (Nirwana Resort Centre), and because we didn’t understand the instructions clearly, we kind of got lost a little bit. the good thing about it though is that we got to see other parts of Nirwana Gardens. we passed by Wildlife Explorer which is some kind of a zoo and even reached Nirwana Beach Club Cabanas, where we finally agreed on asking someone for the direction to the place where we really need to go. we were then given a map and it stated that it should be on the other way. yeah right. it only shows that we really did NOT understand the instructions from the reception. haha.

we did reach the Resort Centre before it closes and we did enjoy a few rounds of bowling.

we went back to our suite very tired and sleepy. my body was a little bit aching which I thought maybe because of walking, swimming and bowling. I dozed off early.

we woke up very refreshed the next day, 16th sep/friday, our 6^th anniv as lovers, our 3^rd month as  a married couple, and our last day there (but wait there’s more! just stay tuned). before we even went down to the coffee shop to claim our free breakfast, we were already talking about extending for one more night but didn’t really make the decision right away. instead we just decided that we’ll go for another swim after our breakfast and then will start packing up by 11.

we did swim and swim again. while at the pool, I was already thinking, “today is the actual day that we’re supposed to celebrate, not yesterday, and yet we have to go back home today?”.

by past 10AM we went back to our suite and started packing up. a miracle happened. we talked again about extending our stay and we finally agreed to really do it. so with no second thoughts, I called the reception and looked for a manager to hasten the process and to avoid the usual i-apologize-for-the-inconvenience-but-we’re-unable-to-blahblahblah. in just a few minutes, the manager I spoke with over the phone was already there in our suite settling the payment matters.

so yeah, it’s 16^th sep – our 6^th anniv / 3^rd month as a married couple, and we’re outstation to unwind, relax and celebrate. how cool was that?!!!!

and when you thought that everything is already perfect, you’ll be surprised if things become even much perfect-er (if only there’s such a word).

I may be able to find the words from my very limited vocabulary to describe the place and the food that we had but there will just be no exact words to describe the very “thing” I felt the moment I saw that seafood resto floating on water facing that insanely majestic and truly magnificent sunset. to behold such beauty is a sign that life, may it be unfair sometimes (or most of the times) still has something spectacular to offer.

that night made all our anniv celebrations in the past look so ordinary. that night made me believe that dreams and fantasies can really come to life (if you’re with the right person). that night made me think and believe that I don’t and did not have any regrets in my life, that I don’t have insecurities, that I am worth all the love and attention this beautiful world has to give. that night made me believe that life itself is beautiful.

after that sumptuous, lovely and romantic dinner at Kelong, we had another round of bowling in the resort centre and I even got the chance to sing in their KTV bar. when we went back to our suite, it was hubby’s turn to doze off early. I still watched Sex and the City on HBO until I fell asleep.

so again, we had our 2^nd free breakfast the next morning and had another swimming session until 11AM. and because we extended for 1 more night, they allowed us to stay in the suite until 2PM (instead of 12PM, the standard CHECK OUT time) as a courtesy, because our ferry sched is at 3:30PM. and just like that, we’re back home.

so yeah! I mean, who’d have thought that I, one day, will deserve to be pampered like that?!

life, though this is already a cliché, really is full of surprises. and God is just so marvelous that He designed life like this – very unpredictable, filled with different kind of mazes and so full of… life! (huh?!). and He is so awesome and great and wonderful for designing my life like this. I’m with the man I never imagined I deserve to have to begin with and yet now here I am, enjoying all the perks of a beautiful life because of him.

that 3D2N stay at Nirwana Resort Hotel (Nirwana Gardens) was indeed the most fun-filled and superbly romantic anniv celebration we’ve ever had. and the joy I felt especially on that special night is just incomparable and remarkably amazing. it’s the awesomest feeling I’ve ever had in my 27 years of existence on this planet and I swear will never forget it…ever.

goodnight message?

define shortcoming.

according to merriam-webster: it is an imperfection or lack that detracts from the whole; also: the quality or state of being flawed or lacking.

spell shortcoming.

S.O.R.R.Y.

sorry baby for all my shortcomings... i'll do my best to make it up with you. just please have more patience with me... i'll work on it, i promise.

what are short nails for?

these:

are for this:

yebah! i got this on 2nd Sep 2011, Friday. it's not brand new but i got a good deal that's why i bought it. and... i really miss playing guitar.

so yeah! ^_^

the reward for losing

how do you accept defeat?

first, you need to make sure that you're in a battle/competition, that you did all you can to win and you strived so hard to get what you deserved. second, you need to know when the fight is over. third, you need to recognize the difference between losing and winning. fourth, after knowing that you’re defeated, u need to take a moment to accept it . and fifth, you need to deal with it. you need to make a choice – either to whine all day and night or be happy despite the pain and grievances it caused you.

why do you need to make a choice? because if you don’t, you’ll be stranded in this journey.

when I was a kid, I was thwarted so many times. during those days, i normally used my remorse to push myself to become better in whatever field where I got defeated. then i’d always return to the battle for revenge. back then, I can’t seem to handle defeat the right way. I can’t seem to just give it up, accept the bitter truth of losing and move on. what i’d been doing before may not really be ideal but I have to admit that it somehow helped me become a stronger person. still, my old ways are not only not ideal, they’re also not advisable and are full of side effects.

so yeah… it doesn’t matter if you’re defeated this time. life doesn’t end when you lose one battle. it’s just getting’ started! so right now, immona pick up the broken pieces of myself and the remnants of my dreams and will try to rebuild them in another world which I’m just about to make.

…and when that world is fully created and successfully finished, I’ll let you all know so you can party with me. ;-)

early morning rant?

it's 8:06AM as of this writing and i have just boarded the train. i woke up as early as 5am and yet here i am again, almost late for work. and when i was on the phone with my hubby just about 10-15 minutes ago, i was just blabbering... tellin' him nonsense stuff. yeah totally nonsense. it's like i woke up at the wrong side of the bed today. and i was just. so so frustrated...lately. sigh.

reason behind: i can't seem to work seriously at home. I know, i know. yeah, i'm really not supposed to work at home but in my profession, working at home is inevitable. and it's the best way, in my opinion, to sharpen my skills. unfortunately, all i have been doing lately when i come home from work (aside from/after spending time with my sweet hubby) is sleep at around 10-10:30pm and wake up whenever my iphone would ring the frickin' alarm at around 3-4am. Sigh. 

i really need to think of a better way to manage my time at home. don't get me wrong. of course i also want to rest, who don't? it's just that i still have a lot of studying and learning to do... it's like i'm running out of time...

that would be all for now. i'm praying right now for wonderful things to happen the moment i reached office. Lord God, please help and guide me today. i love you, Lord.


p.s. i need to call hubby now and apologize. love u, bebe ko...

WALA

the moment he stepped out of the room, tears came rushing down my cheeks… i didn’t wipe ‘em… i just let ‘em all fell and damped my face… as my sight got blurrier by every second, i noticed his gaze… oh my sweet panda… he’s carefully studying my face.. he seemed to pity me… i hugged him… but this time even tighter…

*** *** ***

why do we, girls, keep saying “wala” when something’s really wrong? why do we still have it at the back of our minds that they, boys, will one day comprehend or sense what we feel without having to say it to their faces. we already know that boys will never figure out the complicated thinking of girls but why do we still hope that one day they will? no wonder we end up frustrated… or worse, hurt.

Ø i thought that if there will be one person whom a guy would trust with everything about himself, it’d be his wife whom he also treats as his bestfriend (unless it’s just what the wife thought all along). everything means every thing. past, present and future. yeah, the past shouldn’t matter anymore, but it’s not the content of that past that matters to her. what hurts is that whatever is in that “past”, she doesn’t seem worthy enough of his trust, to know.

· he said he’s slowly opening up… slowly? please define that word, because he’s one of the few persons she knows who is not fond of waiting. and the girl, mind you, has waited for years already. I repeat, years.

· she said, even if they don’t talk about it ever again, the sickening thought of it will remain in her mind. as expected, he really didn’t bother to bring it up again. of course!

Ø she felt so sorry for ruining his plans, especially "that" plan. yeah. it seems she’s really not an expert receiver of surprises. she may know how to surprise others but it really looks like she can’t handle being surprised (no wonder she has a way of spoling ‘em – surprises). it sucks that she can always remember how it all happened and would always shed a tear or two, because of what could’ve happened had she not been provoked to do what she shouldn’t have done. but who’s to blame? she.

Ø happiness is a choice. if it really is just a choice, then the only reason you’re happy is because you CHOSE to be happy. nothing more nothing less. or if you don’t find any more reason to be happy, you have to choose to be happy so you’ll stay happy? SAY WHAT AGAIN???!!!!

as of this writing, my heart is racing again, but this time it’s because i’m so full of it. so full of these unidentified sentiments. this may not necessarily be because of a person but of the things that just happened and things that may keep on happening. SIGH.

“wala” is the conversion of SIGH into words. “wala” summarizes the undefined feelings and jumbled thoughts of a girl who, at her exasperation, can only say one word when she’s at the peak of her emotions. so don’t dare ask me now if something’s bothering me, coz I definitely would say, “WALA”.

palpitation attack

lately, i've been suffering from frequent heart palpitation. at first, it didn't really bother me as i've experienced it before and it didn't seem a whole lot of a threat back then. but like i said earlier, lately it's been coming too frequent that it's starting to startle me a little.

just a few nights ago, i literally was catching my breath, and there's this pain in my chest, and i dunno, everything just got so blurry that i almost passed out (all these happened while i was lying on bed -- imagine?!). i even selfishly asked my hubby, who at that time was preparing to go to work, to stay at home with me as i was beginning to get real scared. good thing the palpitation stopped even before he could consider my request. after that incident, it made me think of seeing a doctor. but then, what would i tell him? what would he ask me to do? then i dismissed the thought immediately.

last night, after i had another palpitation visit, i decided to look it up on the internet and here's what i've got:

Palpitations

ALSO KNOWN AS:

Pounding in the chest, Rapid Heartbeat, Irregular Heartbeat, or Racing Heart

DESCRIPTION:

This is not a disease but a congregate of symptoms in which the patient suddenly becomes extremely aware of his heartbeat, often describing fast, slow, regular, or Irregular Heartbeat.  Pounding in the Chest and fluttering are terms often used by patients to describe their Palpitations. Palpitations may have a sudden or gradual onset, and may be triggered by certain factors. Under normal conditions, electrical signals travel to the heart and stimulate it to pump blood to other body parts.  Redistribution of the normal electrical impulses gives rise to abnormal patterns experienced as Palpitations.  Consequently, it may feel as though the heart is missing or skipping a beat, but in reality there are extra or premature beats, or an early beat followed by a pause (rest), then a heavy beat. Benign (not dangerous) Palpitations are common, lasting for a few seconds with no other symptoms.  Frequent Palpitations associated with symptoms can be dangerous and may require immediate attention.

SYMPTOMS:

Often asymptomatic, lasting a few seconds to a few minutes Feeling that the heart is racing, Pounding in the Chest, or fluttering Skipped beat or extra heartbeat may be felt over the chest or the neck Dangerous symptoms include: Dizziness Light headedness Shortness of breath Chest pain Chest pressure or heaviness Fainting Pain in the arms, jaws, or neck Occurring often Lasting longer than a few minutes and with symptoms. 6 or more extra beats per minute. Beats come in runs of 3 or more. Heart rate (pulse in the wrist) more than a 100 beats per minute without any activity, fever, or drugs (normal heart beat is 60-100 beats per minute).

CAUSES:

Heart disease: Arrythmias -- any variation from the normal rhythm of the heart Any structural abnormality, such as mitral valve prolapse Diseased blood vessels -- coronary heart disease Congenital heart defects -- defects present at birth, such as a hole in the heart chambers High Blood Pressure Thyroid disease Hypoxemia or conditions that lower blood oxygen levels, such as lung disease Acidemia -- an increase in the acid content of the blood as seen in some lung problems. Low Blood Sugar Anemia (low blood) Smoking Cocaine use Amphetamine use XTC Caffeine -- coffee, tea, sodas Alcohol Vigorous exercise Stress Anxiety Panic attacks Lack of sleep Over eating Medications including over- the-counter cold remedies, Diet Pills Overdose of thyroid medicine, theophylline, or some antidepressants

HOW THE DIAGNOSIS IS MADE:

A general physician may need to consult a cardiologist if he suspects heart disease as the cause of Palpitations. Medical history: Symptoms -- how long, how often, sudden, other symptoms, or triggers? Past and recent illnesses, surgeries, medications, habits, allergies, and family history Medical exam: General exam -- entire body, blood pressure, pulse, and temperature. The doctor may listen to the lungs and the heart using a Stethoscope. Tests include: Electrocardiogram (EKG) -- records the electrical activity of the heart and provides information about the rate and rhythm of the heart (painless and fast). The doctor may order a Holter monitor (Walkman-size device that you take home and record the heart's activities over 24 hours.  This is also painless test but can help to identify the time, triggers, causes, and types of arrythmia. Echocardiogram -- uses sound to provide a picture of the heart's structures.  It can show enlarged heart, defects present at birth, or abnormal valves. X-Ray of the chest may show an enlarged heart or lung disease. If other conditions are suspected, blood and urine analysis may be needed.

TREATMENT:

Treating the underlying cause is the first step. Most Palpitations need no treatment. Avoid stimulants such as alcohol, caffeine, tobacco, Diet Pills, emotional stress, or fear. Learn to meditate and relax Multiple medications including beta blockers such as Atenolol can normalize the heart rate and offer relief. In some cases cardiac surgery or other procedures may be needed.

IF YOU SUSPECT THIS CONDITION:

Adjust your diet, sleep, rest, relax, and avoid stress.  Contact your doctor for a checkup.  If you have any of the danger signs and symptoms, call 911.

i know now what is wrong. it's simply STRESS, LACK OF SLEEP, and uhm, OVER EATING? hahaha, i think it's time to go on diet. really! so, immona work on that stress thingy first, and then i'll try to sleep more during the night and yeah, maybe i will, uhm, lessen my food intake a bit? hahaha.

that's it for today! immona take a bath now and go to work. see you again... later. =)

LET THE THROWING OF STONES BEGIN

** I used to have this 'unpublished blog' (which I called My Confession Room) where i pour out some of the things that i have in mind. And this write-up which I wrote on 13th October, 2009 is one of those. **

*******

I wonder why criticizing others has been part of our daily life when we ourselves hate being criticized. When does one earn the right to criticize others? And is there really such a thing as “constructive criticisms”? How can that thing which most people loathe be constructive when all it does is point what’s bad in what you think you do best in life?

Endless questions and no exact answers…

Yesterday, my dad and I were practicing the songs that I would render on Carleen’s upcoming wedding. I was having a little difficulty in hitting the exact notes for the song, “Now that I have You” while my dad also was having a hard time perfecting the chords, yet he’s pointing it out to me that the notes I was hitting are just not it. In my mind, I have this thing going on, “why don’t you perfect those chords first and I’ll take care of the notes?” but I know that it wouldn’t really help any bit. I also had this gut feeling that the notes I was hitting were really correct as I’ve listened to that song several times already. But then, who am I to say such a thing to my dad? I’m just an imperfect lacking with experience singer while he’s been a musician for ages. When I was nearing frustration, I headed for the stairs and listened to the song myself again. And again, I was right. I was really hitting the right notes all along and yet my dad is telling me otherwise. I came to him and asked him that we listen to it again. He agreed.

The song’s original key is at Ab. Since it’s already been settled that I don’t have a good low-notes register, I requested that the song’s key be transposed to one key higher at least. And my dad said ok to it. However, the notes he’s instructing me to hit for the chorus are just not it. I know. I really know. So when we listened again, I tried to make him see my point. I came to him with no expectations, so even though I know that I was right, it still surprised me that I really was right all along. He stood corrected and for the first time, I felt different about this whole thing.

Now it put me into thinking why we, people have made criticism an everyday habit when we ourselves are threatened of others’ criticisms about us. Wouldn’t it be much fairer if we just mind our own business and just be happy for others’ successes in life? Or would that be too unrealistic and too out-of-this-world? Since no one is perfect, isn’t criticism just rubbing it in the fact that we would never be perfect? And if one needs to be perfect first before he could criticize others of their wrong doings, then there should be no criticism at all flying around because nobody is perfect and will ever be perfect.

While I’m contemplating on this argument in my head, the Lord’s message about judging the sinners in the book of John came to me. Let me quote a few verses from the book of John, KJV Bible:

8:1   Jesus went unto the Mount of Olives.

8:2   And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.

8:3   And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

8:4   They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.

8:5   Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

8:6   This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.

8:7   So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

Now that is a rude awakening!

Hear me out; if there really is such a thing as constructive criticism, I just hope it really would help the person it would be casted at. Maybe criticisms are not really about the “perfect bullying the imperfect ones”. Maybe it’s really all about helping others see that there is always a spacious room for improvement. After all, it’s also in the Bible that open rebuke is better than secret love. I just hope that although we can no longer remove the fact that we are an everyday critic, I hope that it will be for a divine purpose and not just for the sake of criticism itself.

I know I didn’t end up with a good conclusion today. Blame it to my still mystified psyche.

This has been me again, saying that with an open mind and heart, I know we could make even the most insulting and mortifying criticism we receive every day, a key to our progress.  Until next time, same room…

homesick?

as i am typing these words, it is already 2:18 in the morning and i obviously can't still manage to get a decent sleep. i am actually tired and sleepy already but i can't get myself to rest and sleep. sometimes it's just really ironic. but i don't think it's irony this time. i think i'm just feeling a little bit homesick. =(

sigh. after two months of enjoying my hubby's sister & cousin's company, now they're finally back home. they're presence here somehow made me forget all about the things i miss about our country. but now that they've left us already, i just feel a little sad and now here, restless...

...but i have work later. so whether i like it or not, i must force myself to go to bed now. i'll see you again... later.